Thursday, March 16, 2006
Had quite a good day today.
Found myself a job after trying for a month. Nothing fantastic, but nonetheless, i am happy, at least, start all over again. I shall not despise small beginnings.
Met up with Weili today, sms Jiaming and saw Jiezhi with his girlfriend. Cool, so many people in a day. And yes, now all my boys are in army, leaving only Mr. Showen still in civilisation. Showen, Kambatte neh! You are the last to fall in! Hahaha. Had a good time catching up today over my usual rasberry tea from Starbucks. Haven had a relaxing time for so long, and i guess this will be my last? No more luxury of having coffee in the lazy afternoon anymore. But then again, i rather to be working then doing anything else. At else, i work my ass off, i am still paid la!
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While waiting for weili today (as usual), suddenly had a thought on many things well, certain friendships, certain people. I guess, from what i have experience these few months, be it getting into a new job, leaving it, finding one, meanwhile catching up with friends, so on and so forth, i have learnt 2 major things, and this 2 will be the major in my life from now on. My perspective has changed towards these things from now.
Throughout these one month, i realise, there are people whom i realise, are worthy for me to press into their lives, some which is just a waste a time. Period.
Competitiveness was the one word that came right into my mind. People fight, when they are in school who has the highest score who has the lowest, they fight when they step out into the society and work, what kind of job you are in, most importantly, how much you are getting paid, they fight, literally everything. Which is true, from keong's blog, i don't fight my enemies everyday, those that i fight everyday, are my friends, those constantly around me.
I came to think competitiveness = materialism? My thots nonetheless. Don't blast me off. So what if your results are better? It doesn't mean you are successful? So what if you ger a higher pay? it doesn't mean that you are successful too? I came to realise, having more money, or having any social status isn't anything important. It does matter to me at a certain time. I wanted to outdo many people when i graduated. But after going through some things, i realise i have been missing out alot of things.
Therefore the decision to start all over again and work from scratch. I realise taking small steps at a time is the best choice for me. No doubt taking big steps and leap, AND IF YOU CAN MAKE IT, you will be successful. But how many can actually make it? I fell though. And people who take small steps at a time usually are more steady and secure.
So what if i earn less then others? At least my life is more fullfilling then before i must say. Fighting more wil only make me thirst for more. Alittle fight is good. But too much will cause you lots of harm and humongous "medical bills".
I shall not despise small beginnings. Taking joy in everything i do and go through. Build up my character again, to build up everything else i have lack in providing for my loved ones.
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Which leads me to think about happiness. My relationship with Mr BigBig. The many other relationship that are around me.
I must say again, that my man don't have to be a very 'high-up' in society man. I remember a friend once asked me, "You like xr to become a photographer?" imagine saying "this is my husband, and he is a photographer." of cos, saying "hi, this is my husband, and he is a doctor" is much better, but, yap i have found my answer to answer back. Photohgrapher by nature is a profession too. For one, not everyone can be a photographer. At least, you and i can't.
I rather be the woman behind my man, supporting him in whatever he chooses to do. I guess that is definitely the primary role of a woman behind the man of the house.
Money can be earned, but not happiness and character. Not forgetting character can only be moulded when you go through tough times. Money cannot make you successful and make you leave a legacy once you are gone. But character does.
One more thing which i need to highlight, that is money cannot bring happiness. The world now has turn so many couples to become materialistic. Happiness don't drop from heaven you know. Yes, with no money, you will quarrell, over it. But if you truely love each other, you are willing to work hard together to bring in the pennies and the pans. In that process, you go through thick and thin together, your bonds will be stronger, and thus happiness will come, because you will love and most importantly treasure each other even more. At least for one, money when you have plenty, and not manage properly will make you become a complacent person toward anything. Just look at Paris Hilton herself. And why issit that we usually have the perception that once our husbands are rich, they may go out and play, because tons of women will be flaunting their assets at them. And not have the same perception when our husbands are not that rich? Well, i must say is a very thin line to cross over here.
In my own words, money cannot buy you happiness and a great relationship. Happiness only comes and will be and perfected when 2 imperfect pple fight together in one heart towards a recognised goal. And their character moulded in the process.
Of cos i am not saying having money is no good. I am just saying, don't look at the money at the beginning of everything. What is important is elements and the process. Money will be the bonus if you pass through each stage.
For once i can say, that i am very happy with what i have now. Especially with mr bigbig. Yes, we do have our quarrells over monetary matters, but each time we go through it, each time we supported each other through thick and thin has brought us even closer to each other. At least, those memories that i held in my heart are so precious to me that i will never forget about it.
*Dun fight back on what i say. Comment only when you agree with me* no one reads my blog anyway..hahaha cool....Something off my mind. Gonna repaint my nails. Bye!! Gonna spend a good 2 full days with my precious darling!!
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Some links to let peeps see what my precious has taken. Ask me? He is the best photographer in my opinion!!
12:35 am
