Friday, November 25, 2005
Yeah finally blogging from office. 10 more mins and lunch would be over. Nah, lunch time is not as rigid as it seems. Is actually very flexible over here. And i have been having like 1.5hrs of lunch break as the team was "having english lessons" aka playing scrabble during lunch. It was very fun, lots of laughter, and for me, definitely, lots of new words learnt.
Worked till very late yesterday, and went for a supper with some colleagues who went back home late too. We had a great time. I had lots of fun getting to know them more. Yeah. One person that i had to mention is Cindy. The fact that we knew each other during our coffee bean days really helped. But she is a very nice lady, been taking real good care of me these days. Treating me food, sending me home and stuff. Love her heaps. My days in the office are so much better becos of her, becos she always encourage me and ask me to push forward and not to give up. The rest of team are very nice people too. I feel like i have known hem for ages. But Cindy is one that really brought me into the environment and shows me warmth in a total new place. *hugs*
Had a very good talk with the man i love most yesterday too. I address the issue that i had to him, and i am so glad that i made the move, and am really glad that i found myself a man who really loves me. Thanks for wanting to help me with it, and thanks for letting me know, that i am the one u love. I knew your initial intentions was for my own good. But though it didn't help. I am relieved to know you will stand by me. So now i have no more issues. I am looking forward to bring our relationship into greater heights.
At times, when i feel like giving up, i thank God for sending me people who would drop by and encourage me. If not for them, namely Cindy and Dada, i wouldn't know how i can pull through these 3 weeks. Yes, is 3 weeks that i am into the job already. Work is piling, and time is passing by scaringly fast.
I wanna go SVC this week. Wanna go do my thankgiving to God.
*back to work*
12:50 pm
Wednesday, November 23, 2005
Something is not right. Am i too sensitive? But things always seem to be different. I have always learnt that "when u are in a wrong, everyone can see it, but only u can't" so it also means "when u are not intending to reveal about certain things, and when pple ask, u might think that u have answered them in a very natural way, but the fact was that u made it even more obvious that u dun wanna tok abt them"
I can only say that i did my best in wanting to embrace this person as a friend that i can feel comfortable with. But it seems like u are putting on the barrier.
Nevermind, I shan't think too much about it. Its not important anyway. But i feel dissappointed that there are things which u are not open about. And i seriously have no idea why. Maybe u meant for a good way. But sorry to say that u made it worse.
I have been sick but still heading down to office to work. Been doing OT, suddenly dunnoe why am i working my ass off. But the thing is, if i dun work my ass off, i will have no money to spend. So well, what to do.
Ciaos, hitting my bed. I am deprive of everything.
10:21 pm
Sunday, November 13, 2005
I forgot to mention...the most dramatic moment in my 3 days of work life.
I broke down in the middle of the lucky plaza food court during lunch time on my 2nd day of work. I had a bad day, a bad feet and i felt very incompetant. And i finally broke down when i was waiting for daphne and saw my little toe bleeding profusely which explains why my toe hurt so much.
My feet still hurts though, and my blisters are not those innocent blisters anymore. They are now bruised badly, very reddish brown. It will hurt even when i walk now.
Haiz, there goes my weekend. Somewhat looking forward to work. Tomorrow will be the first time the person i source coming down for interview. Quite a little achievement. *prays that God will help me and let the person pass the interview* Is gonna be a long week though.
Don't think i will blog till the next weekend comes. This weekend, celebrating Cheerene's bdae. Looking forward to it. Gonna decorate my office desk. Yippie!! HAHAHA!!
10:31 pm
Didn't manage to blog in office. So i waited till today, got some time to sit down and blog.
Have been working for 3 days already. Didn't have the great feelings, becos i guess i am not used to the working life. But nonetheless, there are still countless things for me to learn from. Was so excited about the interviews that i have sit in. Learnt so much from it. Aiyo i dunnoe how to put it into words, but one word of advise to those out there, be enthusiastic when u attend a interview, the tone of your voice, the way u speak, mainly the first impression is very important. Anyone needs a job, just send me your CV, and i will try to match one for you. Let me know your name too. SMS me for more details.
Been doing alot of readings, trying out on phone interviews, I dun think i have anymore problems in matching CVs. The next step will be to polish up my interviewing skills, find more candidates for the jobs available and start interviewing.
My office environment wise is very good. I have nothing to complain about. I am very bless to have such nice colleagues in my first job. Always encouraging me, though sometimes i feel a little out of the group. But nonetheless, they are still very lively and bubbly colleagues! Yes! All of them! And you know what? My office will have a feasting party every friday! IS the company's way of gathering the whole office and have a great time together. SO fun!!
Did i mention about my team leader Jason. He is a very nice guy, coaching me patiently and answering all the questions i have. My office has a culture that everytime when a person closed a case, they will email the whole office and share the joy with everyone. On friday, the IT (perm) side closed 1 or 2 case, (is their first one) and everyone was so happy, and they starting hitting on the desk to make a joyful noise. Then someone from my side decided to stand on the table to show victory, so the other colleague of mine make a comment that my team leader will never do such a thing like standing on the table. So the one that stood on the table challenge her, "f Jason stands on the desk, you treat all of us to lunch?" She said "fine". So colleague D when to tell Jason about it. Jason thot why not? Free lunch leh. So he stood on his desk lor! Horray!! Hahahaha Free lunch!! YEAH!!! All of you must see the scenerio. It was so funny. And Jason just blush, literally. It was so red!!! HAHAHAHAHA. But nonetheless, thanks to jason, Free lunch!!
Actually i was having my low time jitters on thursday. I felt so out of place, so imcompetent in work place. I was sick at the same time. My feet hurt so terribly. I reached my high point when i met daphne for lunch, becos my feet heard so much, i found myself a seat in the food court, sat down and check what happen. I dun know why but i just hold it anymore, i cried, when i saw my feet bleeding. Called dada to shu ku. I think is just the kind of emotions i get when i face a new environment. I am trying to cope, though not so well. I guess is just a personal thingy. I just don;t feel great about myself la. Wonder how will the next week be like. And my poor feet. Is now so bruised. Even the auntie who sold me the pair of slippers say said that i was a poor thing.
Had a good time spend with dada. He has been so nice, picking me up from work, these few days. Such quality time. Went for a voluntary work with his mum. I didn't do anything la, as i dun know what to do also. Dada was there to take pictures. So nice, to see so many people with a kind heart helping all those less fortunate. There was a incident where a group of mentally diabled all stuck in the almost spolit lift. They were trapped for a good 15 minutes. When the repair man finally came, and got all of them out, one was so frighten that she cried and trembled. I felt so painful when i saw her. She must have went through tremendous fear.
So bless to have my dada with me la. He has been giving in to me, helping me fianancially. Must help him out when i get my pay. I am looking forward to spent my next available time with him. He must be in camp sleeping now. Hehehe. Miss him heaps.
2:01 pm
Wednesday, November 09, 2005
Today is first day of work. I am so shagged! So tired!!
But i learnt new things..slowly but surely. And my colleagues are a bunch of very fun people. They make me feel so at home. Making sure that i wasn't too nervous.
Dunnoe wat to blog. Just tell u guys that i started work. Pray for me and wih me well ok? I come back for more When i have time. Maybe i shall try blogging in office tml. Yeah.
Love you guys..
(ps: My darling came down especially to pick me up from work. As in literally surprise me. I am so very touched! love you heaps!! Your the best!!)
9:03 pm
Friday, November 04, 2005
I don't know if i should blog this. But i reckon that i wanna get it outta my brains.
I despise men, who thinks that they can have the best of both worlds.
I despise men, who obviously cannot give a woman happiness and still expects her to long for and love him.
I despise men, who simply have no gulity conscience at all.
I hate having to share my bed with another woman.
I hate not being able to have the full attention of the man i love.
I hate not being able to bring him into light and introduce the whole world to him.
I hate not being able to know every single thing that he does, every single place he goes.
I am a femminist. And i am proud to be one. I believe all women have their own rights. I believe in living my life clear and not guilty of anything. I believe, every women is entitled to their own happiness and they have the full access to it not half.
I dun like it, when u told me that you envied us. No, you can live the your life the way u want to. You also have the fair chances in finding your own happiness. Dun say that u envy, becos you are far more better in finding the true happiness that God has made it for you.
It breaks my heart, when i see that u almost teared just thinking about it. It breaks my heart to see that u are not able to get exactly what u are entitled to. If you are willing, you can get out of this and lead better life. I will lend my shoulders if u need. Unless u wanna get out of the whole thing. U can do it if u want to.
2:33 am
Thursday, November 03, 2005
Counting down....
4 more days...
The return of our beloved Ms Cheerene!!
3:22 am
Dunnoe what to blog.
But i have been spending time to do some catching up these few days. Met my poly friends, my poly bitching kakis. I mean ever since they grow out of TP. I haven really seen them and catch up on our lives as much as we used to. So glad that i am able to catch them before i start to work my ass off.
Thanks to JH, for accompanying me for my checkup today. Enjoyed myself while listening to you talk about the things and people you like and the things you can't accept. Cool. Nice catching up time. Sometimes, too many people around, you just can't be more open and talk about things in a deeper depth. Spent some quality time with xinyu too, talk about the things that is happening around us and our opinions.
We saw women's weekly admist waiting for liyan, this month featured a article about women who helped (yes, literally helped) their boyfriends or husbands to commit rape and murder. Feeling oh so disgusted by it. Sometimes i just wonder, wonder about the functions of our brains and heart. Wonder at how things that happen can caused a normal person to fall deep into the situation and do things that are clearly morally wrong? I mean LITERALLY WRONG IN ANY SENSE!! I can't sleep well if i have a little issue tugging at my gulity conscience. I just can't bring myself to do things which are totally wrong. I wonder really wonder, do they still sleep tightly at night? Still eat heartily after cutting up the bodies? I can't. My gulity conscience still rule over me. I can't, simply can't just to bring myself to do anything be it just think not even do things that are morally wrong.
Getting all jittery again just by mentioning work. Excited yet not really anticipating it to come. Why? I guess i am really excited about the monthly income. The working life. But i kind of will miss the relaxing time that i used to enjoy when i am still a student. 3 more days to working life. Wish me luck man. God please grant me the favour.
Speaking of which. I spent so much just for work. Kaoz, haven even work and earn, i already have to spent so much for it. Cannot believe it.
1:34 am
